1.11.2008

disappointments...

because of pastor's sermon this past sunday, i have been thinking about disappointments a lot this week. i have thought of them in three different ways.

pastor steven referred to disappointments in regards to our Heavenly Father and how we have let Him down. that is something i know i have done and his sermon really spoke to that. the main focus of his sermon was that just because you disappoint God, He does not "un-appoint" you from what He has planned for you. that is so comforting to know that our God has a plan for us and even when we let him down or do Him wrong, he still loves us and still wants His plan for us carried out. this was the first disappointment i have thought about this week.

another way i thought of disappointment this is when we disappoint another person. i am the type of person who is built to please. a people pleaser - if you will. i thrive on building others up and not letting them down. so i really try not to disappoint other people. i have also been disappointed by other people in my life. who hasn't been? disappointing or be disappointed by someone else isn't a pleasant experience. but it happens.

what happens when we are let down by something or someone else?? this brings me to the third way i have thought of disappointment this week.

last year, i experience a lot of disappointments. and because my life was so full of them, i put them behind me and i sailed into this year with the attitude that it is a new year and i shouldn't face too many disappointments. well,i was wrong. already in this second week of this new year, i was thrown a disappointment. i didn't even see it coming, it came out of no where.

after a year of feeling beaten down, i don't have the strength to pull out of this one. it is too early. it has pretty much hit me and knocked me down. being down is not a fun place to be. it tends to immobilize me. my attitude is less than positive. my heart just feels broken and sad. my head is spinning. my body is tired.

as a wife, mom, servant and Christ follower, i have to make the decision to see past this disappointment. to rise above it. to see this as part of God's plan. to know He is with me even though i feel alone and far from Him. to feel the hope and faith that only He can provide. i have people counting on me. He is counting on me to get up from this interference that threw me off track.

but not today. i have another wound to heal. and it will take some time. i know what i need to do. i just need some time to get there.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

first, i love you.
second, i pray for you.
third, i understand.
jess

Anonymous said...

I'm so sorry for the deep disappointment that you're feeling. Please know that you are in my prayers and that although I'm a new friend in your life I am hear for you if you need anything even if it's just a listening ear.

Ken, Amy, & Will (for now) said...

give yourself time. it will get better, i promise! He has big things planned for you!

Kelly H. said...

I just caught up with your blog! I am praying for you friend, I know it's been hard. I love you and am so thankful your wonderful family is in our lives!